Funny Sayings

[Mikey]

I just had to post this lol:

Bowling balls are like whores
you pick them up and finger them
throw them into the gutter
and they come back for more...

[VMX_SKYmx99]

not really a saying, but I thought it was funny when my roommate said it the other day.

...That makes me madder than a midget with a yo yo.

[ddmx]

Occifer, I swear to drunk I'm not god.

[VMX_SKYmx99]

-Last time she saw 90210 was on the scale

[Voutare]

"I'll kick your ass so hard your brother will feel it."

"If I wanted lip from you you'd be on your knees."

"I'm sweating like a (derogatory term for black man) trying to read."

[kevin131mx]

From Nitro Circus
(When referring to a trick that was just perfomed)


"Yall had more extention than a black barber shop on that one!"
-Hubert

[mxracer118]

excuses are like ass holes, every one has one and there full of shit.

[kevin131mx]

This one is a little too well know but eh...

Rap is like candy- you have to throw away the rappers.

and...

Retards
Attempting
Poetry

[Voutare]

This one is a little too well know but eh...

Rap is like candy- you have to throw away the rappers.

and...

Retards
Attempting
Poetry

Aww shit, get your towels ready it's about to go down (shorty, yeah)
Everybody in the place hit the fucking deck (shorty, yeah)
But stay on your motherfucking toes
We running this, let's go

I'm on a boat (I'm on a boat)
I'm on a boat (I'm on a boat)
Everybody look at me 'cause I'm sailing on a boat (sailing on a boat)
I'm on a boat (I'm on a boat)
I'm on a boat
Take a good hard look at the motherfucking boat (boat, yeah)

I'm on a boat motherfucker take a look at me
Straight floating on a boat on the deep blue sea
Busting five knots, wind whipping at my coat
You can't stop me motherfucker cause I'm on a boat

Take a picture, trick (trick)
I'm on a boat, bitch (bitch)
We drinking Santana champ,
Cause it's so crisp (crisp)
I got my swim trunks
And my flippie-floppies
I'm flipping burgers, you at Kinko's
Straight flipping copies

I'm riding on a dolphin, doing flips and shit
The dolphin's splashing, getting everybody all wet
But this ain't Seaworld, this is real as it gets
I'm on a boat, motherfucker, don't you ever forget

I'm on a boat and
It's going fast and
I got a nautical themed
pashmina afghan
I'm the king of the world
On a boat like Leo
If you're on the shore,
then you're sure not me-oh

Get the fuck up, this boat is REAL!!!

Fuck land, I'm on a boat, motherfucker (motherfucker)
Fuck trees, I climb buoys, motherfucker (motherfucker)
I'm on the deck with my boys, motherfucker (yeah)
This boat engine make noise, motherfucker

Hey ma, if you could see me now (see me now)
Arms spread wide on the starboard bow (starboard bow)
Gonna fly this boat to the moon somehow (moon somehow)
Like Kevin Garnett, anything is possible

Yeah, never thought I'd be on a boat
It's a big blue watery road (yeah)
Poseidon
Look at me, oh (all hands on deck)

Never thought I'd see the day
When a big boat coming my way
Believe me when I say
I fucked a mermaid

I'm on a boat
I'm on a boat
Everybody look at me 'cause I'm sailing on a boat (woaah)
I'm on a boat
I'm on a boat
Take a good hard look at the mothafuckin' boat (sha-sha-shorty, shorty, yeah)

Just so you know, you left yourself wide open. Went in for the kill.

[Pumaxcs]

This boat engine make noise, motherfucker
Gonna fly this boat to the moon somehow (moon somehow)
I fucked a mermaid
Just so you know, you left yourself wide open.

I couldn't quit laughing when I read these lines.

[Turbine951]

LOL, I actually enjoy this song. Its so dumb, its funny.

[Voutare]

Strangely I do to. Maybe it's because the song is meant to be a parody. If it were 'serious' I'd hate it for being bad. :/

[JETZcorp]

Some of these will be funny, and some just offensive to some people.

"You must get behind someone before you stab them in the back." ~ Monty Python
"The religion of one age is the literary entertainment of the next."
"The Bible contains equal amounts of history, morality, and pizza." ~ Penn Jilette
"Common knowledge is a lot less common than we'd like to think."

All I can think of at the moment.

[kwic73]

Shake.... and Bake

[firthy689]

Sometimes I wish i could be you, just so I could be friends with me!